How to Support a Loved One with Driving Anxiety
A road accident can cause devastating physical injuries, but the emotional impact can be just as severe. Seeing a loved one suffering after a traumatic accident can leave you feeling helpless, but there are ways to support them with their recovery.
McAllen personal injury lawyer Dr. Louis Patino highlights the vital role you can play in helping a loved one regain confidence and get back behind the wheel — even if you don’t know what to do or say — based on his years of experience representing clients with anxiety after an auto accident.
What Is Driving Anxiety?
Driving anxiety is a fear of being behind the wheel, commonly triggered by trauma like a car accident.
Driving anxiety is a legitimate mental health issue. It is not a case of the nerves or being overly cautious. Some people with driving anxiety can suffer crippling fear and panic attacks, while others may develop post-traumatic stress disorder and struggle to socialize or even leave their homes.
It is also common, with one study citing that up to 47% of auto accident survivors experience increased anxiety or a driving phobia. Sadly, many individuals suffer in silence, not wanting to burden loved ones with their emotions, making it vital to know what signs to look for.
Many driving anxiety symptoms are generalized signs of anxiety. This fact can make it challenging to pinpoint driving anxiety specifically, but a loved one exhibiting any of these symptoms is a potential cause for concern:
- Sweating or shaking
- Complaints of stomach pain or nausea, especially during conversations around driving
- Refusing to drive
- Procrastinating on tasks or activities that involve driving
- Chest pain
- Shortness of breath
- Hypervigilance and overprotectiveness
- Persistent worry.
Supporting a family member or friend with driving anxiety requires patience and understanding, but how exactly can you help?
Create a Safe and Comfortable Environment
You cannot help a loved one cope with their driving anxiety if you don’t know they are suffering, so the first step is to create the space for them to confide in you.
It’s vital to recognize that your loved one may have preconceived notions about their anxiety, such as:
- That anxiety makes them weak, and they need to “stay strong”.
- They don’t deserve to feel anxious.
- Others have it worse.
They might feel foolish or embarrassed for feeling the way they do and fear judgment from others. Reaching out is often one of the most challenging steps, and you shouldn’t feel hurt if a loved one doesn’t confide in you immediately. The most helpful thing you can do is create an environment where they feel safe and establish open lines of communication so they can talk about the accident and their anxiety when they are ready.
Avoid putting pressure on them to talk about their accident, even if you’re concerned they might have anxiety. Remind them you are there for them and will listen without judgment, but be prepared to change the subject if they aren’t ready to talk — forcing the issue can make them withdraw.
When they explain their feelings, your immediate response might be to offer a solution or want to “fix” the situation. Remember, it’s enough just to listen. You do not need to have all the answers, and your loved one won’t expect you to. What they need more than anything at this stage is to feel heard and validated.
Offer Support with Other Tasks
When dealing with driving anxiety, everyday tasks can feel daunting. Routine activities such as getting the groceries, picking up the kids from school, and running errands can suddenly become overwhelming. Don’t underestimate the value of helping with practical tasks.
You are not enabling their avoidant behavior, making them dependent on you, or delaying their recovery by offering support. Overcoming driving anxiety takes time and must be gradual to avoid major setbacks. Instead, see your role as reducing the burden and giving them the space they need to focus on their recovery. You may need to remind your friend or family member of this, as they might feel like a burden. Reassure them you are happy to help because you care and that they would do the same for you.
Explore Their Recovery Options
Overcoming driving anxiety is rarely straightforward and can take time, but you can support your loved one by educating yourself on the various treatment options and how they work.
Tailored support from a professional can provide guidance and shortcut the recovery process compared to going it alone. Various therapies are effective for driving anxiety.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is an effective therapy for many mental conditions and disorders. It works on the premise that thoughts influence behavior, so by reprogramming negative thoughts, we can change the behavior — or outcome — into something more positive.
Engaging in the CBT process can help you better understand the unique way driving anxiety impacts your loved one. Supporting them comes back to the two fundamentals: be patient and willing to listen if they want to talk about their progress.
Exposure Therapy
Exposure therapy involves a person with driving anxiety exposing themselves to a fear or trigger in a controlled way. This therapy can give accident survivors a feeling of autonomy. The key is to take doable yet challenging steps to enable progress. For example, a person might start by sitting in their car for 10 minutes. This might sound trivial, but it can be terrifying to someone who cannot even look at their car without having flashbacks of their accident. However, once they’ve done it, they realize they are safe. From there, they might drive to the end of the road and back or make a short trip on a quiet road.
As your loved one’s support system, you can play a vital role in their exposure therapy, such as by accompanying them when they sit in the car, driving down a familiar road with your loved one in the passenger seat, riding shotgun the first time they venture back out on the road, or standing at the end of the road to greet them after their first solo drive since the crash.
Help them Adopt Healthy Coping Mechanisms
Professional support is beneficial for helping a loved one overcome anxiety in the long term, but there will inevitably be times when their anxiety peaks and they need a more immediate solution.
Coping mechanisms can include mindfulness practices, physical activity, guided visualization, and progressive muscle relaxation. It can help to familiarize yourself with these for when you’re with a loved one when they encounter a trigger or panic attack. Logical thinking can go out the window when anxiety sets in, but you can guide them through it. Engage in breathing exercises with them — even if you feel silly. Go through the alphabet and take turns to spot something beginning with “a”, then “b”, then “c”, and so on. These techniques alone will not prevent anxiety, but they can help individuals manage their symptoms as they work on their long-term recovery goals.
Encourage Them to Contact a Personal Injury Lawyer
Legal action might be the last thing on your loved one’s mind when they’re recovering from a car accident, but if someone else is responsible, they may be entitled to compensation for their injuries — including emotional distress triggered by driving anxiety.
You can support a loved one by encouraging them to see if they have a claim, researching law firms so they choose an attorney they trust, and helping them document their physical injuries and anxiety to maximize their payout.
The more you understand about your loved one’s situation, the better equipped you are to assist them with their driving anxiety, but remember, you do not need to have all the answers. Patience, openness, and simply being there throughout their journey make a massive difference.
